Club Med, Nusa Dua - Bali

Exotic, enchanting, extraordinarily friendly.

That’s what the advertisement says. What can I say? All three words plus some. Put it this way, you want a complete rejuvenating escapade, spectacular scenery, wild choice of activities, free flow of food and drinks, and get this - couple time without the kids, then, this is your answer.

Let’s list the pros of Club Med, Nusa Dua.

1. The exotic architecture (carvings & statues), music, sand, sea and sun that is uniquely Bali.

2. The Comodo Dragons (very buaya/biawak-like) the size of young alligators scurrying around the compounds as if they were second nature and impose no threat to humans. Very kewl and convincing. But then we watched them from raised bridges…

3. The never-ending flow of snacks and drinks by the pool. Fresh juices, milk shakes, cocktails, mocktails, hot beverages, pizza, bread, olives (?) – you name it, they have it – and it’s at your beck and call at any time of day. Macam Raja I tell you…

4. The ultra fit and terribly good looking 300 plus GOs (General Officers) from differing countries, clad in red tops and white bottoms, ranging from barely there skimpy shorts to boring belia-3K long pants, who are constantly cheerful, upbeat and smiling 24/7, and ever ready to engage you in small talk, challenge you to a game or dance the blues away. They are there and they are everywhere. They may be in a serious life and death discussion, but the moment you pass by, Chin Up - Colgate Smile - We’re here to Brighten Up Your Day attitude shines through like a 200 watt lightbulb. You just can’t ignore them. They refused to be ignored.

5. The exhausting types of activities that you can join and play - all free. Every sporting game under the sun, including golf. Snorkeling, yachting, rafting, surfing (The Surfing Instructor himself was a god-like exotic creature – yum!). Acrobatic flying trapeze, bungee bounce, archery and a whole lot of other strange sporting activities that I can’t recall. You can tell I’m so not a sports buff.

6. The array of entree, main course and dessert for breakfast, lunch and dinner - just the sight of the food can make you combust in your own saliva. There were fois grass, salmon fondue (kelass gitu...) etc for the coneisseures, eastern and western cousine for the Barbarians, pizza and chips for the little people, and a mile long table of dessert and fresh fuits. I ate sweet Markisa till the seeds fell out of my ears. When in Club Med, only one rule applies. Eat till your heart's content. Even the deep fried frog legs looked extra scrumptious. And if 'that' part of your anatomy acts up, no worries. Head off to the beautifully designed restrooms, and just do what you gotta do. No water? Again, no worries. Just ask for bottled Aqua. You want 4 bottles? They give you 4 bottles. See? Even 'that' part gets first class treatment. Washed down by bottled Aqua? Maan...! We're living the life of Beyonce and Kimora!

7. This is my favourite. The different type of junior/kids/petite Clubs that you can send your kids to, from 9am to 7pm. You collect them for dinner, then send them back to the Clubs to get ready for their night gala performance. They perform, you watch, you pick them up again, and back to your rooms for a good night sleep. The kids get entertained with 1001 activities the whole day, and you…. Hahaha! You need me to tell you what to do without the kids? Tralalalala…. One thing’s for sure. This is definitely the place where parents get a decent holiday too… you know what I mean. (Then again, I’m just suggesting. When you come with friends and family, the boys get together and engage in all the sporting stuffs… and the girls? We tread merrily away to the Mandara Spa and massage the blues away… Darn satisfying if I may say so!)

8. What else… what else… Oh yes. The impromptu sketches of Marilyn Monroe dying in the pool and saved by The Hulk, Superman, Bruce Lee etc, the daily Water Aerobic sessions taught by the GOs (the annoying fun-fair music accompanying the dance is a killer though), the nightly performances and outdoor dances that you can participate in, the disco which ends at 2 am, the free neck and shoulder massages waiting by the pool…

9. That’s it. And if it all gets a little bit too much, just roam Bali town and get a taste of Nasi Padang, watch the Barong and Kechak dances at the Puras, surf shop along Kuta/Sanur or if time permits, catch the sunset at Ubud or fine dine in Jimbaran. All pretty tourisy but you haven’t done Bali if you haven’t done that. Oh.. and you gotta braid your hair too.

The Cons :

You want to go again and again and again.

Well, maybe if not Bali, then definitely Club Meds the world over. You get spoilt at Club Med.

Other holidays will never be the same…

School Holiday Alert

Its school holidays again… and the pressure begins.

I always feel a slight dread when school holiday approaches. I would let out a Red Indian whoopee-yell if I was a kid, but since I’m now only a kid in my mind, and no one else seems to agree with me, plus the fact that I have kids of my own (I do? Did I forget that?)… the thought of school holidays feels me with a slight panic.

It was definitely easier those days. A weekend trip to the bookstore, where Mum goes shop-gallivanting, and Big Sis and I would be left to sit on the floor of the store and pour through book after book, that would be pure heaven. It was just Jaya PJ, the book store below Kathy’s Toys (where Lil Bro would be), but the thought of spending time on store floor would leave me sleepless in anticipation.

I hardly remember going to malls, unless it was Raya time. That would include a trip to Mun Loong and Globe Silk Store, and we would be yawning tears every five-minutes tagging behind mum. The highlight of the day would be lunch at KFC at Sungei Wang Plaza. School holidays at home would mean a lot of book reading, bicycle riding and playing make-believe in the compound of the house. And we would be happy.

D1 and D2 now have toys leading all the way up to the ceiling. Turn every page of a Toys-r-Us catalogue, and they would have almost all of the featured items. A hundred Barbies and accessories, including cars, shops and whatnots, premium kitchen sets, all doll play-sets (changer, cot, iron set, baby carrier, pram, car seat… basically, every necessary item for a living baby, in doll size), vanity table and real makeup (no thanks to their Cu Pit), BBQ sets, motorized cars, bicycles, scooters, every game imaginable (including gambling games… ahem!), sports equipment, tents, special girly sleeping bags with matching torchlights, water tumblers and camping chairs, portable stereo, portable DVD player, Game Boy (all pink, of course…), and books enough to fill up a school library. Any toy or book, you name it, chances are, they’ll have it. Heck, I still have unopened presents from two years back… the storage problem is a killer.

I would have been happy if I were them. But, no. They still call endlessly at the office, asking when I’ll be home, when can I take them to the playground, when I can bake cakes and lasagna with them, when can I play the new game with them, when this, when that, and the list goes on. I should be proud, toys don’t seem to do it for them, they want the company of me mere mortal… but it sure adds to the pressure cooker. So I try to come up with new ideas to entertain them.

I’ve camped with them overnight in my tiny garden. We had the tent and all camping gear up, complete with the gas-cylinder portable cooker. That was fun, except LV refused to join in and preferred the comfort of the soft bed upstairs (very wise of him, I must say…), and I ended up not sleeping a wink because of the ruckus the frogs in my sorry excuse of a pond were making throughout the night. Decepticons slept well, though.

I’ve brought them on morning nature walks, gone cycling with D2 at the back in the sport child seat, gone kite flying, danced in the rain, had dressed-up tea picnics in the garden (with real miniature china, cup cakes and tea), drawn and coloured, played hide-n-seek, monsters, police-n-thief and brought them to restaurants and malls till they beg to be left at home. They now only want to go if it includes movies or sessions at Art Attack.

But I’m still trying to outdo myself. We went ice-skating last Sunday. I ended up on my rump a little too many times, LV swears he’s sprained his ankles and Decepticons pleaded to go home. I’m signing them up for holiday swimming lessons tomorrow, on top of the weekly sessions they have at the Club. That’ll take care of at least two weeks of weekdays. Perfect.

After that will be three nights at Club Med, Bali followed by another PD trip. If there’s any weekend left, we’ll slot in a Kebun camping or a Bukit Tinggi horse riding trip. Or if I’ve run out of steam or energy, another ice-skating trip would put a stop to my fear and it’ll be their turn to panic. And panic they will be... if I have anything to do with it.

The thing is, are they the ones complaining or I’m the one on a guilt-trip? Doesn’t really matter, does it. At the end of the day, we end up happy… albeit sometimes, bruised and wary. A family that plays together, stays together. That reminds me. I haven’t gotten them started on AEIOU or Ting-Ting yet. Another weekday woe gone. Darn…! I’m Good!